are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
