hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
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