On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
