This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
