id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
