im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
try to milk me bitch
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
