I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
