I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I want to have your abortion
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
