at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
