i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
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