So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize