im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
