stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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