Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
