Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
You can't motorboat a personality
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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