Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
