Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
