You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
