well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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