Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
