What a fucking waste of an outfit
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Randomize
