Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
