hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
