I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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