I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
