You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
