i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize