You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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