i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
