AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
