Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
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