Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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