Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
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