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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I feel like abortions should bother me more
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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