If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Randomize
