Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
