No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
