She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I think I am morally bankrupt
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
