So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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