Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize