It's Friday. Sex?
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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