At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
