Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
