I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
