I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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