and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Randomize