But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize