OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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