weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
She's the barista slut.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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