On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
