we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
