the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Randomize
